a_natural_beauty

Things have calmed down a bit with my family. It's been about two months almost since he has passed. So much has happened - some good and some bad. Looking back some of it was silly to be so worried about but then again how could I have known...? For example there was the subject of my nephew David and I honestly wasn't sure what would happen with him and his custody. His mother lost it years ago and my parents are his guardians now. But with my mom's health not in the best something needed to be done with where he would live and who would raise him. While my dad was still alive it was talked about if my parents couldn't keep him that he may go to my one brother and his wife since they got along so well and they are a well adjusted couple with a stable home life. And this was sort of the idea for a few weeks at the start of things. Now things have calmed down between David and his mom and from what I gather he wants to live with her as well as I don't think my brother and his wife are in a place to take on David since they lost their son Alex this past August. But I was somewhat involved I feel like I was more than I should have been but I was worried about David since for awhile there he wasn't wanting to go back to his mothers at all.

Then the topic of being power of attorney for my mother was something I realized I did not want. I was and still am okay being the top person on her living will but the idea of being in charge of everything in general truly caused me deep anxiety. I was actually considering getting on anxiety medication because my worries were so bad that I would mess up on something. But now two of my brothers have taken charge with that role - or Medical power of attorney - I'm not sure to be honest and it's okay to be in the dark with this subject. Hopefully that doesn't sound bad. The idea of making major decisions or following through with legal stuff I feel like would be better for someone else. Maybe that's secretly the good thing about having all older and more experienced siblings. My mom seems to be more understanding about my thoughts on the matter. I will do as much as I can for her and do everything I can otherwise. Taking that weight off my shoulders has helped greatly.

We will be having a meeting tomorrow about things with my mom with my siblings, her and two relativities who have been staying with her. I hope it goes well, there have been some disagreements and issues with some stuff. From my mom's first marriage there are a total of 5 living children. Then Anna and I from my mom and dad and also there are 5 children from my dad's first marriage. Only one daughter is involved, both his sons have passed on as well as his one daughter. But out of those kids it'll just be my mom's biological children involved with this meeting. Sometimes I feel like it's so many kids and then other times it feels like it's going to work out.... mixed feelings at times. Family has and probably always will be complicated.

Back to my dad and grieving him... it's been difficult at strange times. Today for example I was off and home all day, I decided to take a bath. I like to listen to the radio and one of the only stations I could get in was a weird christmas one. It was fine until I got out and one song just caught me off guard... I think it was have a merry little christmas or something along those lines. And towards the end of the song it talked about being all together if the fates allow. And then talking about just getting through it if that wasn't the case.... or something like that. And it just caused me to break out and cry and it sucked. Then there are other times where I am out in public and I just want to go home, I just hate being around strangers and happy people and all the noise and sights and smells. Some kind of overload. Lately this has been happening in restaurants when Mike and I are out. I just get annoyed and cross.
When I do see other old men I don't get mad or sad or anything like that. It honestly makes me happy when I see similar old men that remind me of my dad. I've talked to other people and have read in some of the grief books that sometimes seeing someone who looks like the one you lost can be upsetting but this hasn't been the case with me. My dad would sometimes joke about girls finding him to be a cute old man. He would wear a baseball cap (one of his Vietnam ones usually) and suspenders. That was usually what he would always have one. Sometimes some brightly colored shirts or sometimes some more down to earth colors. Blue jeans or dress pants depending on where he would be going. But it's funny how many other old men wear similar clothes to him or walk like him or just have an air to them that gives me comfort in a strange way. They are still here and alive while my dad is gone. And it doesn't make me mad but just happy that these other cute old men are around living their lives.
After awhile reading the books was making me sad. A few times I would start to get teary eyed while reading and after that happened so many times I was just tired of being like that. Reading usually makes me feel great emotions but to just feel so sad and heavy was getting to be too much. So now I will read other books like 'Sunrise on the reaping' has been a good distraction.
Being at my mom's at times makes me still very sad. Last week I had a good cry when the subject of deserts came up. My mom offered us ice cream and other goodies like my dad would always do and it just sucked... knowing he will never be able to offer us any home made cookies, cakes, brownie's, ice cream again. I hate it. That was one of his favorite things. He would always be baking or cooking. He loved food and sharing it. He made this cinnamon type cake the week that he passed and I took two little pieces back home. It was a yellowish color with homemade white icing. I remember eating a piece the day of his calling hours before I went and the day of his funeral before I went to that, too. And it gave me a sort of weird comfort. The last food my father baked and shared. As I ate both pieces I had another good cry. Food honestly hasn't been the same, I think about him a-lot when I eat strangely enough.
Having his dog now has been a blessing in disguise. Fynn was greatly loved by my father and now that I can love and care for him has been good for me. I feel like I less sad at home now. I play with him, talk with him, take him out on walks. It's peaceful to have him around. And both Wiley and Fynn have become fast friends which is nice. We still need to figure out the potty training. That has been difficult. Also sometimes Fynn is still stealing Wiley's toys which is a pain. Wiley has been better about getting his toys and playing keep away. The two of them will work things out I think, it's been close to a month now and the two have only gotten into two little spats over toys.

I think I have mentioned it before but after we lost Alex in our family some of us started to get things in order with our funerals and planning those out. I'm grateful my dad and mom did this. Just about 20 some days before he passed. My dad and I had a conversation about death and our remains. He bought his plot here in town and for a minute I thought about wanting to be buried next to his plot even through it may not be a green burial. That was when I found out how costly it would be. Dad told me it didn't matter where I would be at when I passed because him and mom had the same view - the body is just a vessel and when we are dead it's just a body. So he supported me in wanting to still do a green burial and after some thought I decided that I could still get that when I pass. Because my dad will always be with me in spirit... and I like to believe he can still live in me and everything I do. That gives me some comfort.

For the last few days I've been reading 'Sunrise on the reaping' by Susanne Collins and it's hard to put down! I've always been such a big Hunger Games fan. With the new movie coming out next November I've been seeing hints about it on social media and out of curiosity picked up the book I bought awhile back. The grief books were good but after awhile it was just making me feel sad and I wanted to read something different for a bit. And this has been a good distraction, especially with Christmas going on and not feeling the holiday spirit this year. It's nice to just throw myself into a book and a series I love.

This book is about Haymitch Abernathy and the Quarter Quell that he ended up winning. So far I am on chapter 13 and there has been a-lot of older characters in the mix. Learning more about Mags, Beetee, Wiress, Plutarch, President Snow and now Effie. And of course Haymitch! There is a-lot that makes sense about his character and backstory. So far the story is pretty messed up with all the corruption of the Capitol and President Snow (I expected no less) and I know it'll only get worse. I loved the second book (Catching Fire) so when I learned that these older victors are a part of the story.

Are any of you guys Hunger Games fans? If you are do you like the movies? The books? Both? Let me know, maybe in the future I'll try to write more about this subject.

Ouch! It wasn't a good experience. I was told a few months ago I would need a cap on my left lower back molder and I had no idea it would be such an experience. 2 1/2 hours at the dentist. I want to say that was the longest I've ever been at the dentist. First step was getting around the tooth taken away and taking out the current filling. Then also this piece of wire to go in-between my gums and tooth.
I have a small mouth to begin with and it was just painful. Even though I was numb my jaw still hurt so much. And the dentist herself wasn't exactly in a good mood, making some somewhat rude comments and I could just feel from her body language that she was wanting to be done with my mouth. The taste of the filling coming out tasted so bad and the other weird things I could taste my mouth were awful. I'm not a big fan of this dentist. But they still take my insurance and they are the closet. I may change in the future... I'm not sure yet.
For the next two weeks I can not chew on that tooth, I have some sort of covering over it now. Chewing gets tiring on just my right side so I haven't been eating much. I haven't been eating much after my fathers death anyway - I just have a lack of interest in eating. So I guess it's good timing... but gosh, like another ten days of this before I go back... it feels like a-lot. Also I can't brush that area or floss around that tooth.
Have any of you ever had to get a cap on any of your teeth? If you have - what was it like?

It took me a couple of months but I'm glad I finished reading 'Chrono crusade' again. I think this was the third time reading it. I bought it back when I was in high school, one of the first manga series I got into. I always liked the action, humor, art, characters and story. Being just a teen back then it was probably a bit on the heavy side but I that's okay! It's only eight volumes long, if any of you are curious to read it. I feel like it was a fairly simple read and wasn't too timely. I don't want to give too many spoilers but some of my favorite parts were the start of it with the characters together like Azmaria and Satella with Rosette and Chrono working as a dysfunctional team. And I loved the later volumes that cover the flashbacks with Mary Magdalene and Chrono. IT would have made the story too long but I wish the four characters - Rosette, Chrono, Azmaria and Satella - would of had a bit more time together since they felt like they had a good thing going for the plot and worked well together. It felt strange finishing up the last volume after my dad's passing since so much of the book covered topics like death, loss and sudden changes in life. Bittersweet almost.
Next I'm going to be reading different comic books I have laying around that I have been meaning to get rid of. Maybe later on in winter I'll re-read another manga series but for now I'm good just focusing on reading books I'd like to rehome.

I know I was going to start trying to get into the habit of coming back on here again but I have some terrible news - as you all know from the title of this post. My father, my dear daddy passed away on this past Friday the 24th. My mother and him were home, it was about 3 in the afternoon before my nephew who lives with them was expected to come home. My mom got up from her chair in the living room and fell. When she went down she was in such pain - she knew she broke her arm. My dad went go to get her but when he stood up he had complications somehow - either it was his heart or his breathing since he didn't have his oxygen. My mom could hear him but not see him with how she landed and he was yelling for David to come home, that they needed help. David came home and found them - mom on the floor and dad hardly able to stand. David went to get his oxygen - which was on the other side of the room - to try to put on him but dad had just enough time to tell his grandson that he was dying and to call 911 for mom. I think it was after this dad fell onto the floor or he was already on the floor, I can't recall. David made the call and they came. My mom was in shock when she found out he had passed. When I got there they were taking her out in a stretcher and my sister and I got to go upstairs with David to see dad. It was more awful than I expected. There was some blood by him so the next day there was talk that it may have also been a brain animism? I honestly think it was his heart or breathing. My mother and nephew are filled with guilt. The night we came back from the hospital she cried all night and kept saying she killed him because if she wouldn't have fallen he would still be here. We all know that isn't true but still, how can you convince her - she's grieving her best friend and husband. I feel like David's guilt may recover sooner but he is still filled with hurt. I'm filled with a mix of emotions - why this way???? Why couldn't he have died in his sleep? Or down in the basement or somewhere else where it didn't involve my mom and nephew like that... it just upsets me so. Each day I've been crying a bit less, but still just crying and mad and sad and confused and scared and lost. We have been preparing for my mom's death. For months now she has been going down hill. Someday I may be more at peace but for now I still can't understand why the three of them had to be involved like this...
So many other events followed after this tragedy. I'm still trying to grieve for him and deal with present bullshit that some of my family is causing. We knew there would be issues when my father passed but I never expected things to happen so soon and so badly. A few people in my family have turned out to be pretty awful just days after his passing and I have been learning who I can trust and who I cannot going forward. But I may go into that in another post. For right now I am trying to honor him and remember him for the wonderful person he is. November 17th would have been his birthday and I already gave him his gift - a Cleveland browns clock I won in a pumpkin painting contest at the start of the month.
Today is his calling hours. I am putting in his casket a coupon book I made him several years ago, two younger photos of me - one of me in kindergarten and my senior year photo and I wrote him a short letter. Tomorrow is the funeral - on Halloween - which I think someone mentioned would be a bad day for it, but I don't think my dad would have cared. He liked Halloween. In the meantime I don't know much much time I will have free because I will be helping my mother and nephew as much as I can be. I put my comic Promised Memories on hiatus for now. It's strange, I was actually thinking about that as of lately, of what it would be like if it was on hiatus. I love you all and hope you are doing well. Take care of yourselves and give your loved ones hugs and kisses when you can. Life is way to unexpected, short and unfair.

Talk of death, green burial, cremation and donating bodies are going to be talked in this post - so be aware.
I'm not sure if I posted about this before - but close to a month ago Mike and I went to view our first green burial center. It's called Foxfield and is a lovely place. It's two hours away and is the closet one. There was another one I was in contact with that is a part of a college - it was a bit more expensive and a bit further west for us. While there I felt hopeful this is what I could do when I pass away - just be a part of nature and give my body back to the earth. I think others in our tour group felt the same way, too. I liked the parrie option more than the forest one.
Soon I was in contact with other funeral homes in the area to compare prices and see how much general services would cost to have my body cleaned up and then shipped down to Foxfield and the prices were terribly high. That's on top of the price of buying the plot and services that would be at Foxfield and I was looking at a scary amount. Places offered payment plans but even so I was looking at a-lot more money than I thought I would spend. I think it was foolish on my part. Right now I am in a place where I can't be careless with money because I still have some repairs on my house that need done. And some expenses in the near future - like dental work that my insurance isn't completely covering.
So these plans for now are on hold. I did look into one option that I'm leaning towards more and more which is donating my body to a medical school. Ohio State University has that as an option and I looked over the site a bit. It would be a much cheaper way to do things and I would be giving my body back to a cause - helping medical students how ever they may need to do it. My main requests are that I don't want to be pumped full of chemicals and viewed by my loved ones. Nothing against those who have that be their final wishes but I just would rather have those who knew me remember me for when I was living and not like that. I don't even wear makeup so the idea of being kept preserved to be viewed and touched and cried over by those in my life seems weird. Un-natural comes to mind. There is also the choice of being cremated which is the most popular choice currently. I could do that but also the idea of being all burnt up like that just makes me sad. I have a fear of fire and feel like that wouldn't be a good way for me to go. But again - all the more power to those who want that!
Currently I am working on my will at least. I actually am meeting with two different attorneys nearby and today is a phone meeting and the other on the 23rd I'll be meeting with in person. And I have read the papers for my living will - I just need to fill it out. So things are going a different course. I have talked to Mike and I have a plan for what I would like done when I am gone to an extent. But talking to these professionals will help with what I need to do going forward.

It's been hard to get back on my laptop as of lately to get on here to read others posts and write my own. But one thing I've been doing is catching up on older magazines and still always reading! always! For a minute I was feeling a bit overwhelmed by reading up to four books at once but now I'm just keeping it at two. I'm working on reading the manga series 'Chrono Crusade' - I'm about halfway done with it. And I'm reading 'My sister's keeper' by Jodi Picoult. But here are some of the recent reads that I recommend for you guys:

'Our bodies their battlefield' By Christina Lamb
This was a book that will change your views on the act of war and what it will leave behind with a woman - be it a small girl, an older woman - no matter what age - this book talks of women all around the world and the wars they have survived through and what a toll it's taken on them. Mentally, physically, emotionally. It's a very graphic book but a very real and good book to read and learn about.

'House of stairs' By William Sleator
I picked up this book because I remembered it as a kid and trying to read it before. I'm not sure if I ever did finish it back then but I read it and understood it now as an adult and it held a much more serious, psychological meaning. A book about these orphans but through a strange set of test, sort of like a training to see how they would react - how they would survive.

'Remarkably bright creatures' By Shelby Van Pelt
I read this as part of the book club at my library. It's a tale that connects an older woman, a young boy, an octopus and a few others together through fate. I loved the writing and I think the older woman and the octopus were my favorites throughout. Talks about life, death, finding oneself - it covers some dark topics at times but was also pleasant and sweet at other times.

'Ishi - Last of his tribe' By Theodora Kroeber
This was a remarkably sad book. I mean, by the title alone you know it's going to be a sad but but while reading this one I got teary eyed a few times. The tribe he comes from is the Yahi tribe in California. The wipeout of his people happens in the late 1800's. He loses his close family one by one. Ishi's sotry is nothing but remarkable.

'Dreams of Joy' By Lisa See
This is the second book in a two book series - the first one being 'The Shanghai girls'. I read it years ago and was always meaning to get around to reading the second book but sort of forgot about it. Then one day my mom found this second book in a free library and thought I would like it so she got it for me. The books cover these two sisters and their later daughter during the late 1930's as they leave china and come to America to start new lives. There is a-lot of heartache and growth throughout these girls lives and I'm happy I own both books now. I plan on rereading them closer together again in the future.

'Tree: Exploring the arboreal world' By Phaidon Tdiitors
Many different artists show their many different views and emotions on trees. This book is beautiful and eye-opening. There are brief descriptions of their works. I loved it from start to finish.

'My grandmother asked me to tell you she's sorry' By Fredrick Backman
Honest thoughts of this book - at first I did not like it and it took me awhile to get into. But it was suggested by my mom and I usually always finish any book I start. But about halfway through the book started to get better, I started to get attached more to the characters and the story made more sense to me. It felt rather long at times but overall is a good book. Told basically from the point of view of this little girl who loses her grandmother who is basically the only person in the world who gets her - she must now hand out letters to people her grandmother knew and learns more of her grandmother and herself through new experiences.

'Angela's Ashes: A memoir of a childhood' by Frank McCourt
I'm sure a good number of you know of this book. I never read it before and a good friend of mine recommended it to me. The author grew up in America during the 1930's and then moved to Ireland soon after and it's about their struggles and hardships. It was a very raw and eye opening book and covered such themes as alcoholism, extreme cases of poverty, hunger and extreme cases of malnutrition.... I'm tying to remember what else - but this was a pretty heavy book with pretty serious themes so just be aware going into it. But it was good none the less and I had a hard time putting it down.

'The last of the saddle tramps' By Mesannie Walkins
'The ride of her life' By Elizabeth Letts
Both these books cover the same amazing woman - Mesannie Walkins who was told by her doctor that she only had less than two years to live she decided to go on a trip out west to see California. At this point in her life she was already losing her home. This was the 1950's and she was 63. She buys a horse, takes her dog and what belongs she has and goes on a trip of a lifetime. Along the way she gets another horse and over America she makes fast friends with almost everyone she meets and becomes sort of a celebrity. Both of these books were very good and I couldn't put them down once I started them. I found her story inspiring.

'Mae West: The lies, the legends, the truths' By George Eells
I did enjoy this book overall but at times it was hard to keep up with because it talked of many famous people I didn't know of. I don't keep up with celebrities to start with - so I had a hard time with the names and older movies and things that went on for this interesting woman. My dad is a big Mae West fan and recently gave me a collection of her movies, a signed photo of her and this book so I could learn more about his favorite actress. I feel like she was ahead of her time.

'Birdwing' by Rafe Martin
This book is losing based on grim brothers fairy tale and I think maybe some others? It was a good read, I feel like this book is geared towards a younger crowd but covers more adult topics. The story is of these seven brothers who get cursed and all turn into swans. Their sister has to knit them sweaters in a short time period to save them. All the brothers get saved except for one who still has one swan wing. He wants to get rid of it and have a normal life at times but then finds his life may be incomplete if he loses it, throughout the book he has dilemmas over the choice. He travels and through some soul searching finds his right path and what's meant for him in the end.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Henri_de_Toulouse-Lautrec

https://www.wikiart.org/en/henri-de-toulouse-lautrec

So far after all the artists I have read - I think only 6 or something? - I think Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec has been my favorite. Not only do I like some of the posters he designed but I enjoy his paintings and I liked what I read about him and his interesting life. For those of you who don't know He broke both his legs early on in life and they did not heal correctly which left him with a stunted appearance. The book I was reading which was written in the 70's spoke of him as a dwarf - I'm not sure how accurate that is. He was born into an aristocracy family, if he would have outlived his father he would have inherited the family title - Comte de Toulouse-Lautrec. He came from a family of inbreeding sadly - his parents were first cousins. That may of had a-lot to do with his health problems.

He was born in 1864 and was considered a post impressionist. He spent a good amount of time in brothels and prostitutes and lesbians, showing up beautifully and naturally in his paintings. He preferred the woman in these places as opposed to plain models. Late 19 century in bohemian Paris seemed like it was quite a time and the fact that he created some works of art for us to view now makes it all the more interesting. Some of the copied prints in the book I read had women embracing and having a some form of intimacy. Others were of people in their natural environments. Henri did have an alcoholism problem and had spent some time in a sanatorium for three months and during that time he drew 39 circus portraits by memory, I find that impressive. He died at the young age of 36 of alcoholism and syphilis. His mother and art dealer kept promoting his artwork after his death.

This past Saturday - on the 16th - my nephew Alex passed away from an auto accident. He was just 25, literally at the prime of his life. We don't know the surrounding details of the crash. It sounded like it was quick, which I hope it was and I hope he didn't suffer. He was such a smart young man, had a good job, loved to travel, loved nature, loved his family & friends. When I think of Alex I can't think of anything negative or bad. Just a happy, warm soul. His smile lit up his face and he gave off such warmth and friendly vibes. This news has left me feeling pretty numb and broken. I haven't cried this much in a long time. It's been on and off now. I wasn't expecting something on this level to happen. At least not to someone to young. I regret not talking to him more or giving him more hugs.
On Facebook his mother has been sharing pictures and memories of him as well as other people - and he's smiling and looking ahead so proud and ready to take on the world in all of them. Laughing or doing something goofy. I'm glad there are so many memories of him out there now to look back on when we need to. When I think of Alex the expression free spirit comes to mind. I've recently learned and saw new things about my nephew I didn't know. Like he was a Jimmy Hendrix fan - in some recent photos he has some cool band shirts on. Or how passionate he was when it came to nature. I knew he loved it and did some landscaping but had no idea hos personal views on engineering and how nature can be connected. It makes total sense - but hearing it from him left me with goose bumps. He recently cut and donated his hair for wings for cancer patients just like me. His father who is my brother, his mother and two other siblings had a special trip this past April that they went to Florida and had a lovely time. I'm glad they had that trip together.
When he was born in 2000 I was just a teen but I remember being around and watching him grow up. He was always such a happy baby. Beautiful blond hair, blue eyes, a wonderful glowing smile. He was their first child and what a wonderful family they always were and became right before our eyes. All so successful and inspiring, I always feel good when surrounded by them. The idea that he is gone now just tears my heart wide open. I don't know why such cruel events have to happen to any of us - let alone someone so special. The last few times I've seen Alex were at family get togethers like Thanksgiving and Christmas. His mother created this game that we play that was fast placed and fun. It involved dice and switching around random gifts and at the end of the game we all got socks with different designs. I loved it because we all got the same gift, it was a game made for the whole family to connect over. And I remember Alex and I think a few others talking out new ideas for next years game - he was so excited and full of ideas. I love thinking of that little moment. Being together under their family roof and seeing their children as adults now sometimes would leave me aw-struck. I can't imagine how it is for actual parents to have raised a child all the way to adulthood. But just as an aunt siting on the sidelines I witnessed such beauty, love and growth. To see these babies become their own people with their own personalities and then to go out into the world and make a difference - it touches my heart that I knew him and that he's made an impact with so many individuals.
This reminds me of siblings I have lost at all young ages as well. Again, I'm not sure why young souls are taken so early. I like to think Alex is up there in heaven now having some much needed time with relatives he hasn't met yet, some that he has and some new guidance and angles at his side. I made plans days ago with a friend who our thing is going to parks to walk and explore. So I didn't want to cancel, I figured getting out of the house would be good for me. Today while we were out I thought of sweet Alex with almost everything I saw. The trees, the flowers, the water, rocks, birds and butterflies I got to watch. Feeling the breeze, the water as my shoes got wet at times, smelling flowers... How much beauty there is on this earth and to know he will always be with me as my friend and nephew brings me some strength in these difficult times.

I wanted to share this article about him and this short video he is in.
https://quietremembrance.site/alex-forristal-accident-mantua-ohio-man-dies-in-traffic-collision/?fbclid=IwY2xjawMQkI5leHRuA2FlbQIxMQABHvBlD7dLwVnqxSaOk8ugu0GWrGB9y3bMOnCNyxUZ-kehUBLGFf6qn8MR7Xym_aem_59HarmSNSHDY0PKW_CezGA

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6WYDBWy4_OI

As most of you know from reading my older posts, my mother hasn't been doing well for awhile. It comes and goes, but for the most part her health is greatly declining. Both physically and her memory isn't what it used to be. This past week my one eldest sister came up to visit her from out of state so there were a few get togethers over there at my parents. The one was us daughters - three of us - got to go through mom's jewelry boxes and take what we wanted. She wanted to do this now for us. Doing this was sad at first but then talking about and learning more of my mom's little treasures was nice, bittersweet if you will. She sat there and watched and listened as we looked. Once in awhile she forgot about something she wanted from a box. Mostly these were filled with different little treasures over the years. There were a total of five. We could also take a jewelry box of our choice.

I took one of the older looking ones that had some birds on it and trees and flowers, pretty faded. When I opened had a hand painted note that it was made in Japan and a Japanese stamp glued inside. It may have belonged to her mother since she did collect stamps. Or possibly her father since he collected stamps and had an antique store. But she can't remember. The box itself is pretty beat up, it's missing a lock of some kind on the front. But I like it none the less and I'm glad I picked it since I collect stamps and have some of my grandparents stamps.
As we went through our boxes we found stuff that had more meaning to one than the other. Like my sister Faith is more religious than Anna and I, so we gave her things like crosses that we found. I got several pieces of jewelry, a few necklaces with very old colorful beads. I got one necklace that is of pearls (possibly real, I need to check..) but it's broken so at some point I'll need to get it restrung and back together again. And I picked up some other necklaces that they didn't want. After I put them on I felt that I could wear them someday. And some purple beads that go to a necklace or bracelet but are just in a bag now. There were some various rocks of different kinds, I took some of those too. And a little box of fools gold. Also two pieces of little wood, I think driftwood. Some random buttons and other beads. Also some pins of different kinds. Another neat find in my jewelry box I found an old clothespin doll I made years ago! So maybe it was meant to be that I picked up the one I did. I asked my mom about the stuff I collected and some of it she could remember where it came from and other things she couldn't. Overall in general I think I got mostly stuff that belonged to my Grandmother, which is nice. I can't remember her too well since she passed when I was so young. It was a nice experience, sad but in a way it's nice she is doing this sort of stuff now while she is still alive.