a_natural_beauty | The guilty pleasure of naps

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The guilty pleasure of naps

Tonight I ended up taking a three hour long nap.... and it really put me in a weird mental state. Not only did I wake up from a strange unpleasant realistic dream, but I must have completely missed hearing my one alarm to take my evening medication. I was only about 45 minutes late from when I normally take it, so it wasn't that big of a deal, but the idea that I didn't hear my one alarm is a new shock.

But with this post I feel I can share some personal details with you guys that I don't normally share these days with other people in my life because I don't want to go into it with them and I feel it would cause worry and I don't want to do that. My mom's health isn't doing well. She has had a number of stomach issues for many, many years now. And got admitted to the hospital Sunday. She's still there and they have been doing some tests on her, trying to figure out what's going on. Today she shared with me that they found out she has a valve that isn't working properly for her heart and that's a big concern to me. Her weight has gone down, today on the phone we talked twice and she sounded so sad when she said she isn't doing any better. She told me this afternoon that she can see new bones showing because she has lost more weight.

I think this is the main reason I slept for three hours this evening after eating a bowl of cereal and watching some youtube. No, I am sure that this is why I slept so long. Because I'm worried about my mom and it's hard doing anything else right now. I would set an alarm for a half an hour, wake up to it, change it for the next half an hour or an hour, wake up to it and just keep repeating this for three hours on my couch. This has happened before, but not three hours in a row.... I need to cut this nap habit off... do you guys have any suggestions? I know that is sort of a weird request. But right now it is after 11 and I normally should be in bed. But right now I am wide awake.

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No suggestions, but just some empathy…dealing with parent health stuff is really hard :(((

Thank you, it truly is. :-/

I had a psychology class in high school where I learned from one of my teacher's tangents that it's best to either take very short naps or long naps and that there's a certain range where you're bound to wake up groggy because of how sleep cycles work. Like don't take 45 minute naps. But I don't remember which side 30 minutes fell in that! He also taught us that having a consistent sleep schedule is better than getting more sleep some nights. These are just some things I thought of reading this post.

In the past I've usually taken naps because I'm feeling depressed and don't want to do anything. In my case that was the cause/effect but it's never been a habit of mine. Maybe you need a productive outlet for working through feelings about your mom's situation?

From more recent papers than my psych qualifications, 30 minutes was the 'sweet spot' of short naps (presumably: for most people), being just enough to clear out the cobwebs and not enough to have fallen into deep sleep.

Sounds right. Good catch.

Thank you.

Thank you, that is useful advice. I will try to keep them shorter, that seems wise.

Thank you, that makes sense. I will keep that in mind when I set my alarm on my phone. ^^;;

Yes, I've been trying to keep myself busy with more stuff. Which has been helping. Thanks!

Oh my God, I'm so sorry to hear about what's going down with your mom; I can say from experience that yeah, moms are VERY special. I love mine to death, she's been there for me more times than I can count.

I don't think it's bad at all that you took a nap, even a three-hour one. It's been scientifically proven that naps are healthy and can provide a soothing feeling as well as an energy boost upon waking. The fact that you're restless about your mom's situation is justifiable for a three-hour nap; I've had to do that several times over the past week or so. When things are looking really bad or depressing, sometimes a nap is the only thing that give you some peace of mind, despite what many would have you think.

Prayers for your mom right now; I often worry about mine too, she's always alone in the house throughout the week while my brother and I are at work. I can't imagine how lonely she must feel until we come home, especially since my dad is out of country right now. Dad isn't the best of company Mom can keep (long story), but that's better than being alone, at least to me.

I hope your mom sleeps soundly tonight, as well as yourself. Please take care. 🙏🏾

Thank you, that means a-lot to me. Yes, I am very close to both my parents. My mom has been through so much over the last few years with her health.

I'll keep that in mind the next time I lay down for one. I actually had a weird one today while I was reading. I would wake up and read a few sentences and then fall back asleep and repeat that a few times.

Thanks, I greatly appreciate that.

Anytime. 😇

I'm sorry about your mom, Jess. My mom is having health problems too. It's no fun. The difference for me is that they've been going on for awhile so I've sort of adjusted to always either being worried or being used to it. It sucks.

My dad has had heart surgery too. Twice. And he cam out of it okay both times. And he's in his 80's. I need to tell you modern heart surgeons are VERY good at their jobs and know what they are doing, especially when it comes to preventative stuff, like my dad's pacemaker and aorta problems. Your mom getting this taken care of BEFORE a heart attack is much safer for her.

Wow, I'm sorry to hear that. I'm thinking of your mom. Mine has been having stomach issues for many years now.. I think it's also her age catching up to her.

Thank you, that is very true and kind of you to say. She isn't worried much about her heart which surprises me. But I am glad that modern medicine has gotten as good as it has. That makes me hopeful. I'm glad to hear your dad is doing well at his age. That's wonderful news.

Thanks, Jess.

You're welcome :-)

Long naps tend to put me in a funk as well.
Maybe you could try a new alarm noise? Maybe you've gotten used to that one.
Though, tbf, it sounds like you could use the rest :(

I'm terribly sorry to hear about your mother's health problems. It's very difficult and upsetting to see a parent struggling with their health. Wishing you both strength through these times.

Ooohh, that is a good idea. I think mostly just trying to keep busy will help my mind and body. I've been doing more yoga this week.

Thank you very much. I appreciate your thoughtful and kind words.

Maybe if you take a nap, take much shorter ones. It can mess with your sleep cycle. I don't nap b/c I get headaches when I do, so I can't offer much help.

Very sorry to hear about your mother. Health issues with parents can be very difficult. I dealt with a bit when my father was ill. Glad your mom is in the hospital and hopefully with the right docs, they can get her sorted out. If you're not noticing any improvement in her care, it is okay to question if she's at the right hospital too. Keep spending time with her and try to get her to eat something (if she is allowed or not special rules to her food intake).

Yes, I think I am going to try to take shorter ones for sure.

Thank you for the advice. Yes, today I got to go visit her with my dad and it was overall a good visit. They have been doing more tests on her and she seemed to be in better spirits today.

I'm glad she's doing better. Hopefully things will continue to improve. hugs

Thank you *hugs back*

{{{hugs}}}

*** Hugs back ***

Oh, that is scary about your mum. I hope that there is a nice clear and treatable diagnosis in the near future.

I don't have any helpful thoughts about the nap side of things. I've learned that I'm really really bad about making rational decisions in the immediate wake after nap moments, and will definitely go back to napping regardless of how foolish an option it is, and thus making life more difficult for future me. As a general rule, I don't allow myself to nap unless there are no time based commitments for the rest of the day, because I will decide that another half hour is fine, and then find myself rushing to do too many things in half the necessary time.

Thank you, I am hoping so as well. She is seeing another doctor tomorrow and doing more tests and that feels hopeful. Today when I got to visit her she seemed to be in better spirits.

Yeah, that is wise! I mostly find myself doing them when I have nothing else going on during the day or evening. But I'm going to try to start making them shorter. Maybe that'll help.

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